Greetings, winos.

I'm going to write about wine here. Seriously, and frequently. Make no bones about it, I am one of the only wine lovers in the world who has both learned sophistication and a felony conviction for assaulting law enforcement personnel. So I'll keep my reports rugged and accurate and to the point, and as vulgar as necessary. I attempted wine criticism on Facebook, but my insights mostly have fallen on deaf ears. I hope to kick up a healthy and passionate debate here...and my first report will commence tomorrow, with a 7 buck magnum of Chilean Sauvignon Blanc. I am often contradictory, and that's something you'll just have to accept. I'm a red wine guy, and white wine always tastes of grapefruit and pears to me, which is not interesting. But I'm pairing this white plonk with some Swai fillets, red potatoes, and kale tomorrow. be there or be square, douche bags.